This is one of "22
virus definitions" (thought-mistakes that cause ineffectiveness
and unnecessary negative emotions).
YOU are feeling down because of a setback, you will tend to make
more mistakes in your thinking, which just makes you feel worse.
Negative emotions can create a kind of tunnel vision where you
focus on all the bad things and ignore the positives. For example,
you make a proposal to four people in a row and every one of
them turns you down. You feel bummed because you're thinking
the idea is no good.
But last Wednesday four out of four said
yes. When you feel demoralized by a setback, that is exactly
the kind of facts you will dismiss or forget. Even if you remember
it, you might dismiss it by thinking, "I got lucky that
People do this sort of thing all the time.
When someone compliments you, what do you think? Many people
will think, "They're just saying that to be nice."
They dismissed something positive. It is entirely possible they
WERE just trying to be nice. But it's also possible they mean
it. You don't know. So why pick the negative one?
The FACT is, the person said something
nice. The FACT is, it is possible they meant it. Never dismiss
facts, especially when it makes you feel bad unnecessarily.
See the complete list of definitions: The 22 Virus Definitions.